The Inner Circle

I’ve had this strange feeling all day, first it was just being incredibly tired, and now it’s developed into a distraction. I woke up mid dream today, I guess any point you wake up and you remember a dream you where in the middle of it, it was strange, I don’t know what woke me up. But I think it might have been the dream, it wasn’t by any definition a nightmare.

It’s been nagging all day, I’ve been putting it to the back of my mind so that I could think about it later. I can’t recall that much of it now, but I’m going to try and go through it.

I’m not sure where it exactly starts, but the earliest point that I can remember is sitting with a group of people from high school, I can’t recall who most of them where, but I know they where from high school. I also know that one of them was Kellie B, any of you who know my high school will know that she was pretty much the head girl so to speak.

She wasn’t nasty in anyway, or evil, she was just a nice girl, good looking, that everybody liked. Most girls wanted to be like her, and most guys wanted to “date” her, myself not excluded. Thinking of this, I guess I’ve been thinking a fair bit about high school after talking to Mark a week last Friday, I went to the pub to see him and Pete Greenwood, and apparently I’d missed a lot of people from high school. Kellie and Cheryl among them, this maybe where most of the thoughts are from.

In the dream I think we where at a pub or other social place, equal number of boys to girls. I don’t recall much about this part of it, just that we where there as a group. The dream shifted somehow to an outside scene, or maybe just a wider angle, we may have been sitting outside.

We all stood at one end of a tiled garden type area, at the other side there was a raised platform. Someone thought it would be fun to see who picked who to pair up, I’m not sure where this came from. The boys stood on this platform, and one by one the girls choose one person to be paired. This wasn’t a pairing to do anything, just a see who would have picked who, I think it was in context of dating, but I’m not sure.

I don’t recall who anyone picked, but I know a black haired girl, average height picked me. I don’t know who she was. I don’t really recall anyone I knew well with black hair.

Our positions where then reversed, the guys had to pick girls. Somehow then there where suddenly a lot more girls, like loads. So again the guys started to pick girls. I don’t recall who the guys where, I do recall that Carl Scott picked Kellie. I think I’d have chosen her, except now I couldn’t.

So I remember looking through the crowd trying to find someone I’d pick. I remember looking through the crowd, I saw Angie H with a rather well done hair style. But I don’t really recall anyone else’s name, faces flick through my mind, but I’m not sure who they are.

I never actually picked anyone that I can recall, I think I began to panic. This is roughly at the point I woke up, I’m not sure what brought this dream on. Maybe it runs parallel to a feeling that I haven’t really attempted to find a girlfriend here at home. I’m trying to find a job, start my life, yet I’m not looking for anything as far as a companion goes. Maybe I’m scared I’ll be left alone. It’s odd, it’s had me in a strange frame of mind all day.

Anyway, about other things, I’ve built studio A’s playout machine for Bailrigg FM, it’s got all the sounds cards in it and it seems happy. Tests need to be run on it, but otherwise it looks good. Then the playout software needs to be finished and all should be good.

Apart from that, not much else,

D.